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Last names like Pigg, Thigpen, Hymen, Fagg, Buttigieg, Dong, Stankey, Lipschitz... My best friend in school was a chubby girl with the last name of 'Waddles' (she remains unmarried).
As soon as I turned 18, I'd be at the courthouse getting that shit replaced with something nice.
by Anonymous | reply 97 | February 28, 2019 1:19 PM |
So true. I know in my researches of a Bastard, Ghost, Sidebottom, Blood, Hatte, Looney, Death, Pile, Tooth, Trout, Coffin, Titt, Moth, Money, Bythesea and Godbehere.
Of course, some of these people tried different spelling to stop others tittering at them.
by Anonymous | reply 1 | February 25, 2019 3:30 AM |
Some people don’t hate their ancestors
by Anonymous | reply 2 | February 25, 2019 3:32 AM |
Back in the day, when I first heard the name “Lipschitz”, I didn’t believe it was a real name. My friend would prank people by calling people named Lipschitz and saying “if your lip shits, my anus talks”
by Anonymous | reply 3 | February 25, 2019 3:33 AM |
And then there's people named Hoare/Hore.
by Anonymous | reply 4 | February 25, 2019 3:35 AM |
The Roudybush(es) and Bushyheads of Kansas.
by Anonymous | reply 5 | February 25, 2019 3:38 AM |
I've wondered about kids with stupid first names- like abcde- do they have to wait until 18 to legally change their name? Or if they want to at like age ten if a judge would be understanding and let them get rid of it.
I know I would've wanted to get rid of that shit asap.
by Anonymous | reply 6 | February 25, 2019 3:44 AM |
R6 a while back, I remember a little girl in Hawaii named Talula Does The Hula was allowed by a judge to change her name.
by Anonymous | reply 7 | February 25, 2019 3:50 AM |
R6 I changed my stupid first name by Common Law decades ago. But I still haven't forgiven my parents for burdening me with it.
by Anonymous | reply 8 | February 25, 2019 3:51 AM |
Correction: I just looked it up, and the story I mentioned actually happened in New Zealand, and the little girl was named "Tallula Does The Hula From Hawaii."
Hope the judge also sentenced the parents to be executed by firing squad.
by Anonymous | reply 9 | February 25, 2019 3:55 AM |
Now that I am older and have put on some weight, especially midsection, I seriously regret that I never changed my name. Too late now.
by Anonymous | reply 10 | February 25, 2019 4:21 AM |
I had a teacher with the last name Shupenis. He went by 'Mr. Shu' but I never understood why he didn't change it. It must've been awful growing up with that name.
by Anonymous | reply 11 | February 25, 2019 4:33 AM |
"I've wondered about kids with stupid first names- like abcde- do they have to wait until 18 to legally change their name? Or if they want to at like age ten if a judge would be understanding and let them get rid of it."
People who don't like their first name can just go by a nickname. People with a shitty last name are STUCK.
by Anonymous | reply 12 | February 25, 2019 4:36 AM |
I've known people with the last names Hooker, Hung, and Dick
by Anonymous | reply 13 | February 25, 2019 4:40 AM |
A good question for Pete Buttigieg.
by Anonymous | reply 14 | February 25, 2019 4:40 AM |
The socialite Hogg sisters of Houston, Ima and Ura, bore their names with pride it seems
by Anonymous | reply 15 | February 25, 2019 4:55 AM |
Ima Hogg's only siblings were brothers—Ura was an urban legend that took on a life of its own. Somebody even started a rumor that she had a sister named Hoosa.
by Anonymous | reply 18 | February 25, 2019 5:06 AM |
R11 Couldn't he have changed the pronunciation to shoop ah nis?
by Anonymous | reply 19 | February 25, 2019 5:17 AM |
Had a HS classmate with the last name of Kuntz. His nickname was 'Ophelia.'
by Anonymous | reply 20 | February 25, 2019 5:56 AM |
R19 He pronounced it shoe-pen-ihs, but we all called him shoe penis
He was a dick so I didn't feel too badly about it.
by Anonymous | reply 21 | February 25, 2019 5:57 AM |
I knew a girl with the last name Aase-hole
by Anonymous | reply 22 | February 25, 2019 5:59 AM |
I shared an office with someone whose last name was Hogg and also knew a guy whose last name was Mudde. In NZ, there is a famous professor name Robert Beaglehole. And there are cute last names there like Snowball and Honeybun. Really!
by Anonymous | reply 23 | February 25, 2019 6:17 AM |
my uncle's name is Richard Wort, and yes, he calls himself Dick, I have no idea why you would do that to yourself. I had a friend at school whose surname was Faggoter, her father was a priest, Pastor Faggoter, apparently it was German, At least my friend, a girl, got married and got rid of it, she has a brother who kept it.
by Anonymous | reply 24 | February 25, 2019 7:27 AM |
Has anyone noticed that people don't pronounce "pianist" the way we used to, such that it sounded like "penis." Now it's "pee-AN-ist." A metoo-ism?
by Anonymous | reply 25 | February 25, 2019 7:31 AM |
R25 I recently heard someone pronounce the name of the planet Uranus as uri-NUSS.
by Anonymous | reply 26 | February 25, 2019 7:54 AM |
Tora Hymen is an old school friend of mine.
She's a scream!
by Anonymous | reply 27 | February 25, 2019 8:21 AM |
R24, I used to work with a guy named Dick Payne. Not kidding. Like you, I wondered why he just didn’t go by Rick or Rich or Richard or Richie. Nope. Dick.
Maybe it was preemptive?
by Anonymous | reply 28 | February 25, 2019 9:35 AM |
I WAS BORN A CUMDIDDLE AND I WILL DIE A CUMDIDDLE
by Anonymous | reply 29 | February 25, 2019 9:42 AM |
A girl a few grades above me at school was called Candida Chicken.....what cruel parents. My grandmother had a friend called Gay Pigeon. My second cousin is called Miles Long
by Anonymous | reply 31 | February 25, 2019 10:00 AM |
I went to school with a kid whose last name was Pee.
by Anonymous | reply 34 | February 25, 2019 2:06 PM |
My friend works for an airline and they used to keep a book of real silly names behind the counter at the airport he worked at.
He's had a Catholic priest called Christmas fly with him.
by Anonymous | reply 35 | February 25, 2019 2:09 PM |
Lesboetha Von Snatchmound
by Anonymous | reply 38 | February 25, 2019 2:24 PM |
Went to school with several Hoggs and a Roach. Worked with a Badcock. Family friends had the surname Smellie, though they changed it to Smillie later on.
by Anonymous | reply 39 | February 25, 2019 2:24 PM |
Mrs Fallice was my second grade teacher. Everyone pronounced it as phallus. I had no idea what a phallus was so I was puzzled when adults laughed at her name. My mother would say things like, "Surely that's not the right pronunciation. Please call her Mrs Falleese."
My uncle had a lot of fun with it, asking if her maiden name was Johnson, or if she had a brother named Dick, laughing at my cluelessness.
by Anonymous | reply 40 | February 25, 2019 2:41 PM |
Because of the large Mennonite community in my home town there were a lot of Finks.
by Anonymous | reply 41 | February 25, 2019 3:38 PM |
Dr. Richard Stiff is an OB-GYN in Missouri.
by Anonymous | reply 42 | February 25, 2019 4:00 PM |
Some names don't become "unfortunate" until circumstances change ... for example, "Hooker" was a perfectly respectable name until the word became associated with prostitution. Similarly, surnames that are shared with infamous people (e.g., Manson, Hitler, Trump) were not an issue until they acquired a negative connotation.
by Anonymous | reply 43 | February 25, 2019 4:16 PM |
Waddles is kind of cute...
by Anonymous | reply 44 | February 26, 2019 5:30 AM |
[quote]Family friends had the surname Smellie, though they changed it to Smillie later on.
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 45 | February 26, 2019 5:43 AM |
Oh, man. I went to school in a small New England town with a Shupenis family. Seriously unforch.
by Anonymous | reply 46 | February 26, 2019 6:07 AM |
I used to work in a large call center, where we phoned people for a variety of surveys. One of the surveys was of ob/gyn's, and there was both a "Dr Love" and a "Dr O".
by Anonymous | reply 47 | February 26, 2019 8:59 AM |
Not really "unfortunate" but I once worked a temp job scanning mortgage documents, and there was paperwork under the name Rhett Butler.
by Anonymous | reply 48 | February 26, 2019 1:27 PM |
A local dentist was Dr. Freeze.
by Anonymous | reply 49 | February 26, 2019 1:33 PM |
I had an internist named Dr. Colon, which he pronounced Cuh-LONN.
by Anonymous | reply 51 | February 26, 2019 2:06 PM |
Fortunately, both Tim and Sam were always Bottoms
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 52 | February 26, 2019 4:43 PM |
I went to grade and middle school with the Butts siblings.
by Anonymous | reply 53 | February 26, 2019 11:30 PM |
My mother sees an optometrist called Dr Seawright. Not an unfortunate name but ironic.
by Anonymous | reply 54 | February 27, 2019 11:18 AM |
R53 i did too. The poor girl was named Candy Butts. What a horrible name.
Were you from MA by any chance?
by Anonymous | reply 55 | February 27, 2019 4:00 PM |
Junior high school PE teacher named Mr. Vallsack. Not positive on the spelling, though.
by Anonymous | reply 57 | February 27, 2019 4:52 PM |
Worked with a guy whose surname was Pozgay
by Anonymous | reply 58 | February 27, 2019 4:54 PM |
Anyone remember John Big Booty?
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 59 | February 27, 2019 5:35 PM |
I knew a Robin Hood (female)
by Anonymous | reply 60 | February 27, 2019 5:38 PM |
I know an ella fonte Elephant in spanish and it fits lol
by Anonymous | reply 61 | February 27, 2019 5:53 PM |
I also knew a girl named Robin Hood at my high school. Also there was a Yvonne Butts.
Not a real person, but the lead male character in Puccini's La Fanciulla del West is named Dick Johnson.
by Anonymous | reply 62 | February 27, 2019 7:05 PM |
[quote]I had an internist named Dr. Colon, which he pronounced Cuh-LONN.
Colón is Christopher Columbus's surname (in Spanish.)
by Anonymous | reply 63 | February 27, 2019 7:37 PM |
When can I change my name at last?
by Anonymous | reply 64 | February 27, 2019 7:42 PM |
There were THREE Harry Dicks in my hometown's white pages, and you'd better believe we crank called all of them.
by Anonymous | reply 65 | February 27, 2019 7:50 PM |
The girl I knew Mari Aase-Hole had a brother Harry!
by Anonymous | reply 66 | February 27, 2019 7:53 PM |
And a little sister Lucie Aase-Hole
by Anonymous | reply 67 | February 27, 2019 7:53 PM |
Maybe it becomes a part of their identity growing up? lack of imagination or pursuance to change it? they like being laughed at or the attention it brings? All of the the above?
by Anonymous | reply 68 | February 27, 2019 7:55 PM |
My elementary school librarian’s last name was “Raper”, and yes, it was pronounced how you think. We were so young that nobody knew it was funny or strange
by Anonymous | reply 69 | February 27, 2019 7:59 PM |
I worked for an investment firm, and we had a client named Minnie Dick. There was also Dick Fister and Horscht Schmidt. I kid you not.
by Anonymous | reply 70 | February 27, 2019 8:03 PM |
There was a teacher in my brother's high school named Miss Fuchs. Of course she pronounced it FOOKS.
by Anonymous | reply 72 | February 27, 2019 8:08 PM |
There was a U. S. Congressman from NH named . . .
Offsite Linkby Anonymous | reply 73 | February 27, 2019 8:13 PM |
"There was a teacher in my brother's high school named Miss Fuchs. Of course she pronounced it FOOKS."
I know someone with the same last name who pronounced it Fyoosh
by Anonymous | reply 74 | February 27, 2019 8:15 PM |
There was a medical practice in my town which employed two doctors : a Dr. Precious and a Dr. Lovely.
by Anonymous | reply 76 | February 28, 2019 12:35 AM |
Near Paris, Texas, decades ago, we drove past election signs for "Bubba Rape for Sheriff." As I recall, he won.
I went to school with Nancy Dump and her siblings.
by Anonymous | reply 77 | February 28, 2019 12:47 AM |
Poor, unfortunate souls. I just don't know what I'd do if I had an humiliating, socially unacceptable name.
by Anonymous | reply 78 | February 28, 2019 1:14 AM |
My name is the eternal unchangeable proof of my parent's love for me.
by Anonymous | reply 79 | February 28, 2019 1:17 AM |
When my aunt started having trouble with her hearing, she went to an ENT whose name was Dr Holler.
There was also a Dr DeKay here, unfortunately he was a family doctor not a dentist.
by Anonymous | reply 80 | February 28, 2019 1:23 AM |
For many years, the last name in the Manhattan telephone book was something to the effect of Zzzherobrouvskiskiskiia, M. I called her once and was promptly rebuffed.
by Anonymous | reply 81 | February 28, 2019 1:27 AM |
I saw a campaign sign in Illinois for a woman named "Phyllisteen."
by Anonymous | reply 82 | February 28, 2019 1:36 AM |
There was a guy at university with the surname Death. People would try and say it “Deeth,” “Dearth”,”De’ath,” whatever and he would politely explain it was “Death”, pronounced how it looked. Made more amusing when he completed his PhD.
I also once met someone from Scotland with the family name “Twatt.”
by Anonymous | reply 83 | February 28, 2019 1:44 AM |
I hope the Twatt you knew didn't have the first name "Ima"
by Anonymous | reply 84 | February 28, 2019 2:00 AM |
No, but it began with A. A Twatt.
by Anonymous | reply 85 | February 28, 2019 2:13 AM |
I agree. At a minimum I would have changed my name to my mother's maiden name.
by Anonymous | reply 86 | February 28, 2019 2:16 AM |
[QUOTE] "There was a teacher in my brother's high school named Miss Fuchs. Of course she pronounced it FOOKS." I know someone with the same last name who pronounced it Fyoosh.
I would say Fewks if I met someone with that surname.
by Anonymous | reply 87 | February 28, 2019 2:21 AM |
Fuchs is German and means fox. It's pronounced fooks, with a short oo.
by Anonymous | reply 88 | February 28, 2019 4:17 AM |
I’ve met a Fuchs who simply said “pronounced Fox” and made everyone’s life easier
by Anonymous | reply 89 | February 28, 2019 4:24 AM |
An old friend used to see a rheumatologist, Dr Miracle.
by Anonymous | reply 90 | February 28, 2019 4:50 AM |
I went to college in Texas and had a classmate with the last name of Rape (he had some little kids at the time). I saw later in the alumni news that he had changed his last name, but it was at least 10+ years. I never understood what took him so long.
My lawyer way back when belonged to the firm of Long, Dick and Seaman.
by Anonymous | reply 91 | February 28, 2019 4:57 AM |
R91 you’ve reminded me that I had some dealings with a woman with the surname “Raper.” That was apparently her married name, so that means she’d chosen to take the husband’s name even though it was that, and there’s a Mr Raper out there too. I mean, it’s not “Rapist”, but prettt sure I would change it.
by Anonymous | reply 92 | February 28, 2019 5:04 AM |
Here in NC during the elections last year there was a guy named Raper going for county sheriff.
It was a little uncomfortable seeing all the signs around with 'Kevin Raper for Sheriff' written on them. Of course, 'Raper' was the biggest word on the sign.
Sheriff Raper isn't a good look.
by Anonymous | reply 93 | February 28, 2019 5:24 AM |
Anastasia Beaverhasen is a perfectly fine name.
by Anonymous | reply 94 | February 28, 2019 5:45 AM |
After someone has lived with their name doe so many years, he/she may have learned to live with their name and not care about changing it. Just like people accept their body type, hair, financial status, living situation, some people accept their name and come to like it, accept it or don't see anything wrong with it.
by Anonymous | reply 95 | February 28, 2019 5:49 AM |
R94 Not as fine and upstanding as my friend Helen Van Patterson Patton.
by Anonymous | reply 97 | February 28, 2019 1:19 PM |
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